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comeback (two years later) at Ss. Swithin and Melchior's. Rumor had it his family had paid heavily to get him readmitted when even the goons at Wayne Academy couldn't beat sense into him, but I believe it could be entirely coincidental that his return to Ss. S&M was followed only two weeks later by groundbreaking for the new convent. Whatever grease had been applied to slip Pete back into parochial school, it wasn't enough to get him any special favors from the nuns. He was plunked into the front of every classroom -- so the nuns could keep an eye on him -- and into the back of every procession, so the congregation wouldn't notice him. The top spots were reserved for the best students. I was one of them. In fact, I was the top student, and that was the second incredible thing that happened to me that year. I had always been a better-than-average student, never coming in any lower than 10th among the 50 or so kids in our year, but never rising any higher than fourth. Aside from Ken Rondini, a curiously neat kid with a strong resemblance to Alfalfa in the old "Our Gang" series (if Alfalfa had been mown down to scarcely more than four feet tall), who occasionally bobbed up as high as second place in grades and won every other spelling bee, the top spots in our class were always taken by girls: Betty, the goodie-goodie; Linda, the heavy-lidded immigrant who began wearing a bra in kindergarten; and Ann, one of those spectacularly unremarkable people, the kind who always hang around the edges of fame, accepted by the stars of life because they so clearly will never challenge for the top. Remember those expendable crewmen in "Star Trek?" Same kind of personality. Anyway, in eighth grade the girls in the class suddenly sank in the rankings. It seemed almost as if they had decided being smart was no longer a good thing. Being a good feminist -- having had that philosophy beaten into me by my older sister, in fact -- I now realize that is exactly what happened, a horrible effect of our maledominated culture's insistence that women must subsume their intellectual gifts or risk scaring away potential mates. Back then, I just thought the girls went all goofy. Whatever the reason, I suddenly found myself
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